:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc():focal(912x228:914x230)/gabby-windey-robby-hoffman-21425-67c9031dc69a4ec5936497ebf705074f.jpg)
Courtesy of Gabby Windey
In celebration of Valentine's Day, PEOPLE caught up with celebrities for What I Know Now: The Love Edition. In the series, stars like Gabby Windey and Camilla Luddington open up what they've learned about dating, marriage, relationships and falling — and staying — in love over the years. Read on for a dose of romance.
There’s no such thing as too close for Gabby Windey when it comes to her girlfriend Robby Hoffman.
“I always want to be connected,” the Traitors star tells PEOPLE. “I could, like, wear her skin. Capricorns need a deep level of emotional connection, but she makes me feel welcome to inquire and kind of push for it.”
And push she does. When Hoffman, who is an Emmy-winning comedian, is on the road for shows, she has a “one track mind,” according to Windey, 34, and needs some nudging to keep in touch.
“I know it's not personal,” says the Bachelorette alum. “But I have to remind her. I'm like, 'No, I want you to check in because I love you.'”
“She’s always so surprised,” adds Windey, who hosts her own podcast Long Winded. “And I'm like, 'Oh my God, no. I want us to be even closer, emotionally, physically.’ So she does need some reminding, but she does great with constructive criticism.”
:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc():focal(499x0:501x2)/gabby-windey-robby-hoffman3-21425-d79e915eb9514a74ad83111b71215f2b.jpg)
Courtesy of Gabby Windey
After moving in together over the summer, Widney says the two have fallen into a rhythm of daily routines that help to keep them in sync.
“In the morning we'll do the Mini New York Times Crossword and the Wordle and Connections,” she tells PEOPLE. “And at night, I mean, even if we're just laying in bed, I feel like we'll just try and connect with each other.”
She remembers a moment recently when, after a long day of traveling, they plopped into bed and began “doom scrolling” on their respective phones. Windey says she pulled herself out of her phone and turned to Hoffman to check in after realizing they’d both been “zoning out.”
“I'm like, 'Are we okay? Is this okay?' And she's like, 'Yeah.' So even just checking in periodically, like 'Do you feel disconnected? Are you okay with us just doom scrolling and rotting our brains next to each other?'”
Windey had very public journey to find love. She appeared on season 26 of The Bachelor and ended season 19 of The Bachelorette engaged to Erich Schwer before the two called it quits in November 2022. Through it all, Windey has learned a lot, especially through her relationship with Hoffman.
“You shouldn't always feel like you're swimming upstream and fighting against the grain,” she says of love. “With Robby, I think it was my first real lesson that I was like, 'Okay, I could just trust myself and my gut.' And I very clearly want to be in this relationship. So then you just work hard to make it work.”
Windey calls Hoffman her “cheerleader” and says she pushes her to dream big.
:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc():focal(499x0:501x2)/gabby-windey-robby-hoffman4-21425-f9ac87891111496c938af4b4c91e4fa4.jpg)
Courtesy of Gabby Windey
“Knowing that she's in my corner and has my back with everything makes me feel like I'm invincible,” says Windey. “She's the best person to bounce things off of. She has great taste, she has great ideas, and she thinks I can do anything. So you have a lot of imposter syndrome and stuff that's happening, but she's like, 'No, bitch, think even bigger.'”
This week, the couple is in New York City to celebrate Valentine’s Day. On Friday, they'll visit hotspot Carbone for a romantic meal. (“We tried to go last time we were here. We were just like, let's try and sneak in and naturally they rejected us," she laughs.)
But no matter where they are, Windey says, “we're getting into the point of our relationship where she does feel like home.”